Happy Almost September! I hope everyone's summer has been good to them, I've been busy per usual but blogging has been on my mind as always. I've been writing, editing and re-structuring this blog post for about two weeks now and I think (well I know) I'm ready to share it with you all. Ever since turning 30 back in February it feels like life just started all over again for me, but through it all I feel a lot stronger than I was six months ago so I want to share with my journey to "THE YEAR OF ME".
Because at 30...that's when life actually makes sense. That's when you give ZERO fucks about what the world thinks about your hair, outfit, who your dating and what kind of job you have because you feel that sure of yourself. It's when you start to see people's true colors and where you should be focusing your energy on and what in life truly matters, because at 30 you know exactly who you are and where your going. I turned 30 on February 18th and thought I was going to die (lol...no seriously, my anxiety was at all time high) because I had this "idea" of what 30 would look like and I felt like I was nowhere near that BUT then I had family and friends that reinforced my awesomeness and made me feel like I was on track so I stood strong in that (maybe a little too strong lol). I'll be the first one to tell you that it was a great celebration welcoming in a new decade but I was not prepared for all the life lessons and hurdles that 30 would bring.
I would have to say that one of my birthday wishes was for a peace of mind and ever since I blew out those candles at my 30th birthday party, my life got 10x crazier. At the time I was bitter, upset and overwhelmed and had no idea how to stay positive. Through reading inspirational posts, devotional emails and spending more time living in the peace I spoke about I realized that God has the right to operate outside of our own understanding. For the first time ever, I had no idea what God was up to but after awhile I stopped questioning and began realizing that everything I was going through brought would eventually bring me through/to this miraculous place that I'm at today and where I anticipate the next chapter of my life to go.
They say when you turn 30, your perspective changes and you see the world a little differently, ladies & gentlemen that is 150% true. I've never felt so many emotions and revelations in my life, like EVER. I feel renewed and I feel like the world is truly my oyster, I started making decisions and choices for me and I didn't allow the world to dictate my future. Although since turning 30 I've lost more friends than I expected, felt disappointed in my life choices, not encouraged and feeling like the world was caving in on me but it was my faith in God and hope that I will see the bigger picture someday.
Well that someday came when I was reading IamNecole and she spoke on making sure your cup is full so you can pour into others then the light bulb came on! I've got to start taking better care of myself because that is a reflection of how the world will treat you (Thank you Necole!). Having two jobs and living a very active social life leaves little room for "me time". I'm constantly clutching my calendar trying to schedule in happy hours/dinner dates and sometimes even time to just be alone. My life can get a little insane at times, but I dare not complain because I function better being busy. The idea of saying "yes" to everyone and giving more of my time to everyone else but myself has left my cup half-empty which in return does not benefit anyone at all. I'm taking IamNecole advice to say YES to me first aka "The Year of Me" to make sure that I'm truly fulfilling my purpose and making the necessary time to do things I love to ensure my cup is not only full but running over :)
Having a positive and hopeful perspective has proven to be a ground breaking freedom that I never saw coming (somebody cue Beyoncé's lemonade album). It has been all I need to help me get through difficult moments in my life because at 30 they will come and sometimes it's hard to see that it will go but it will (just breathe it out). It's so important to understand that even though there may be challenging or disappointing moments in life, realize that it's just that a moment and understand that there is powerful lesson to learned. The idea of being able to press the "reset button" as much as you want, gives me infinite peace I can't describe. Being able to set new goals, reach new heights and maximize your greatest potential has made me feel like it's okay to hit the reset button as many times as you need to.
Necole proposes a challenge (that I'm fully accepting) to get a journal and answer the one question "What do I want from my life?" this is the one question that always leaves me speechless because there is no right or "perfect" answer but makes you think about your dream life and the steps it takes to making it a reality. Between starting a new journal and devoting the next 12 months (beginning officially September 18th) to "The Year of Me" I can't wait to see how much life changes for me with a little reset in motion. Making yourself priority is not a selfish act and it's something I recently learned from a dear friend of mine, treating yourself the best leads to being able to give your best without leaving you empty. Wishing everyone an amazing week and end of Summer! Fall is coming :)
*bows out gracefully*