TALK THAT TALK TUESDAY: What Does Your Social Media Say About You?

 

I'm finally back to my "Talk That Talk Tuesday" posts and I've been pondering this particular topic/post for a few weeks as I know it is a touchy subject. If you follow any of my social media accounts (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or Tumblr) you know the fashion lover, Carrie Bradshaw personality, Social Butterfly throughout the DMV but I'll be the first person to tell you that there is so much more to Schuntel aka 'Ms.Style & Grace/ Ms_Schuntel' than you will even know! Let's rewind a bit, to my first stab at social media...my roommate and Best friend in college got super excited that our school was chosen to be on Facebook (at first Facebook would only allow Ivy league schools on until they realized the high demand from other great institutions like my school, Elon!) so I would always beg her to log on her account to see what everyone was doing until I finally got the courage to create my own account. I remember losing my social media virginity to Facebook in 2005 and I can tell you that it has reconnected me with so many friends and family. It was my first online relationship (lol) that molded my social media experience in a way I would've never imagined! 🙌

From Facebook then there was twitter where I used 140 characters to give my opinion on mostly everything then it was the birth of my blog. Then, there was Instagram after getting my first iPhone and now my latest obsession Tumblr! I remember during my obsession with Facebook I would be so eager to post EVERY picture I took (with no filter) and make a album with a clever caption and share with my 1,000+ "friends" to show them how much fun I was having and being super prest to put up the "in a relationship/it's complicated status" or event the "married to... my bestfriend" just because! Why did I have to do all of that? What was I trying to prove? Was I really having fun or was I was just good at pretending? Out of 1,000+ friends I could only name about 50-75 (friends & acquaintances) that I really knew and cared about. I would say about 3 years ago when my first real relationship failed, I was in the midst of grad school, friendships were changing and I was finally growing into the woman I always wanted to be it hit me..."Schuntel, you don't need to share every aspect of your life. Protect the intimate and genuine moments in your life. Share only moments you wouldn't mind the whole world/Washington Post to know." It was then that I began to become more choosy with what I shared as I was feeling more comfortable in my skin. And although all of my social media accounts needed to be "public" and accessible because of my "Fashion Blogger/Freelance Stylist" title I knew I wanted to keep certain aspects of my life private as those were my moments to bass in not the worlds to judge, mock or speak negatively about. 

As Beyoncè would say "I'm sensitive about my sh*t" and I think social media has a way of taking things to another level that it shouldn't be (I'm no Beyonce but you get my drift). After being addressed on numerous occasions by my social media name in public (A bit awkward but hey, I've been called worse) I realized that what I was portraying to the world would be exactly what I would attract. So I mainstreamed my social media accounts to reflect only that--- fashion, positivity, socializing/networking, certain milestone accomplishments, and quotes here and there to share with everyone. I reserved my intimate moments for close family and friends as they were moments that I held close to my heart. I decided to keep my dating life private as well as limit my family related events that I would post to keep my private life MINE.  When it comes to social media, we've left very little to the imagination...I usually know if a girl is mad at her boyfriend by the subtweets or indirect quotes talking about cheating/loyalty; what someone is eating for breakfast, lunch, dinner, dessert and even their favorite snack and I'll even know the intimate moments of someone's family without even having to ask them the details. I think it's important to leave some room in your social media for a bit of mystery and privacy, I don't see much of this and it truly disturbs me. Does every picture and thought/quote in your head (thanks to improvements in technology i.e. cell phones) need to be shared on your social media accounts? I find that my quiet time with God would just be that (and NO I'm not ashamed of my faith, just trying to maintain a sacred and genuine moment without taking a picture for Instagram or posting a status on Facebook). Even my girl nights-in with my bestfriends would be just that, there is no need to broadcast to the world why I'm in the "house" versus being at the club or lounge. There is a need for validity on social media that needs to change. No shade to those who share alot of their life on social media, my point is to be mindful of the energy you put out as it is a reflection of you. So, that leads me to the BIG question...What does your Social Media say about you? I find me asking myself this sometimes. Do you?

Does the world know your every move? Can we tell how many times a week you go out? Have we've been "informally/socially" introduced to your significant other? Are you being the best version of yourself? Are you really having fun on vacation or you just good at pretending? When it comes to social media, we must first understand that social media is a tool that we yes WE use as a channel of communication with the outside world. The status updates, tweets, and no filter/filter pictures can say ALOT about you before you can even formally meet someone. 9 times out of 10, if you've seen someone's social media account you can come up with a few conclusions without having to "actually" get to know them (not all just a few...remember people only show you what they want you to see). It's so important to do a few check ins with yourself to see what your social media says about you. Are we so eager to post a picture of us out having a good time that we forget to have a good time with the people we are with? I'm totally guilty of this....#Selfie #Usies, etc. lol! Let's learn to be in the moment and use our social media handles to reflect the best version of ourselves so that we attract the things/people we want 😊.

 

Let's stay socially aware of what we are portraying to the world as that is what we will attract and be addressed by. Let's maximize our social media to promote good versus negative commentary and let's use it as a tool to further our career goals. Social media has it's ups and downs but for the most part it keeps us in tuned with what's happening in the world, and that has been the best part if it all! Stay informed, stay aware, stay purposeful and more importantly stay true to who you are!

Happy Tuesday ❤️